Tales Of Misfortune

Oh Yeeeaaaaa

Sun, 11 May 2008 06:40:28 GMT

My Computer Is A French Prostitute

Fri, 02 May 2008 07:21:23 GMT

My Computer Has A Virus.

My "Internet" Computer Anyway,
I'm Currently On My "Work" Computer.
I Have 2 Desktop PCs, I Try Not To Use This One Online Too Much.
It's Primarily For Photo (And Occasionally Video) Editing.
At Least I CAN Be Online Though...

I Just Turned It On Today And The Desktop Image Was Replaced By A Blue Screen That Said
"Your Computer Is Infected With Spyware"
It Had Some Other Stuff On There Too, But i Don't Remember What It Said.
It Also Had A Link That Brought Me To Some Sketchy Website To Download
What They Say Is A Spyware Blocker.

Super Shady.

Totally A Virus.

I'm Not Dumb...

So I Am Now Running Avast On It And It Seems To Be Cleaning Out A Lot Of Crap.
I's Been Going For Almost An Hour Now and Has Only Scanned 7%
And I Think It's Moved Like 20 Files To "The Vault" Already.

Arg!

Anyway, This is My Week:
2 Wakes.
My Car's Trans Blew.
On Top Of That I Had to Re-Schedule A Paid Photo Shoot I'm Doing For the Second Time.
And Now My Computer Has SARS.

I Guess I'm Just Due For A Streak Of Good Luck...

"I Haz To Go To Vault?"

Yes. Yes You Do Virus.
Because You're A Dumb Whore.

Meez!

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 08:47:07 GMT

It's My Meez!

I Can Has Car!

Fri, 04 Apr 2008 07:32:27 GMT

I Gots Me A Used Car.
It's A Shiny (Not Very) Used 1999 Chevy Cavalier Rally Sport.
It, Surprisingly Does NOT Smell Like Feet.
Which Actually Is More Surprising Than You May First Think.
Especially Considering It Was Bought Close To Newark And For $2000.
I Needed A Cheap Car That Was Good On Gas.
My Jeep Wrangler Gets 10 MPG, 13 With The Small Tires.
'Nuf Said About That.

Anyway,It Looks Like Dis...

Only Mine Is Bright Red And Has Actual Wheels.

When I Got It Home It Over-Heated And Looked Like I Had Put A Smoke Machine Under The Hood.
I Was Like "Figures"
Turns Out, After Some Looking Today, That It Was Just A Kinked Hose.
$11 Later My Car Is A-Ok :D

Aside From That I Put New Speakers In The Doors And Replaced A Broken Side-View Today.
I Still Need To Throw On A New (Salvaged) Hood And Bumper Before It's Painted.
It Will Hopefully Be Black By Next Monday.
I Have The Hood And Bumper Sitting In My Garage Currently.

I Suppose I'll Post Some Pics When It's All Pretty.

Fo' Shizzle

May Be The Best Game Ever...

Mon, 31 Mar 2008 07:58:02 GMT

I Know I'm Probably Like A Year Behind The Curve Here,
But I Watched My Lady-Friend Start The New Zelda Game On The Wii Last Night.
It Looks So CoooOOoooOOool!

"Ocarina of Time" Is One Of My Favourite Games Of All Time, (Mario 64 Is Up There Too)
And This Looks Like It Will be A Great Follow-Up.
I Remember Being Younger And Spending Hours And Hours On The Nintendo 64 Running Around Killing Junk, And Finding Junk, And Solving Junk, And Saving Junk.
Oh! And Beatin' On Chickens.

...I'm All Nostalgic Now.

--------

Fast Forward A Few Years And The Gamecube Comes Out.
I, And Ever Nintendo Fan I'm Sure, Eagerly Await A New Zelda Title.
And Then Came "Wind Waker"
I Was Disappointed. I Enjoyed The More Adult/Serious Tone Of The N64 Title.
"Wind Waker" Looked Too Much Like A Hanna-Barbera Cartoon.

However,
I Do Hear Great Things About It, So I'll Hold Off Forming Any Concrete Opinion Until I Play It.

--------

This New Zelda Game, However, Looks To Live Up To My Hopes Of Awesome Awesomeness.
It Seems To Be In The Same Vein That Ocarina Was In.
I Only Saw The First Two Hours Of The Game But It Looks Amazing.
Not Only Graphically, The Over-All Tone And Feel Of An Epic Journey Is There.

I'm Pretty Confident It's Going To Be Awesome.
And I Hope My Girlfriend Doesn't Dump Me For Link...

My Political Stance

Tue, 25 Mar 2008 20:36:51 GMT

You are a
Social Liberal
(76% permissive)

and an...
Economic Liberal
(21% permissive)

You are best described as a:

Socialist

Link: The Politics Test

...I've Seen This Before

Sun, 16 Mar 2008 20:21:55 GMT

So, I Saw Doomsday A few Days Ago...

It Was Like A Mix of 5 Movies I've Already Seen, Only Done Badly.
Not To Say It Was A Bad Movie Though... Well Actually It Was,
It Was So Bad I Was Smiling The Entire Film And Actually Laughing At Points.
So, Since I Enjoyed Myself, It's Still A Good Film To Me...
Oh! And Malcom McDowell Was In It. I Love Him.

Picture The Movie "Mad Max" Getting Sloppy Drunk And Knocking Up The Film "Aeon Flux"
And Then When The Baby Was Born They Dropped It.
THAT'S What This Movie Is.

There Were Many Unresolved Elements And Just Plain Nonsense As Well.
But It Was Totally Ok Because For Everything That Didn't Make Sense Something Else Blew Up.

Ah, That Should Do It!

Thu, 21 Feb 2008 05:34:56 GMT

Addicted

I'll Walk The Tracks...

Fri, 25 Jan 2008 05:05:58 GMT

Cloverfield Was Awesome,
Although I Believe Christina And I Were The Only People In the Theater Who Thought That.
2 People Walked Out And At The End I Heard Some Guys Behind Us Say They Were Going To Find
And Kill The Director...

Sun, 23 Dec 2007 07:46:38 GMT

So I Recently Saw

It Was Visually Ok I Guess.
As Far As The Story... I Couldn't Help But Feel Like There WAS A Good Story There,
Lurking Behind What I Felt Was A Dumbing-Down To Make It Able To Reach The Largest Market.
I Wanted To Like It, But In The End Was Disappointed.
The Ending Killed It For Me.

Now I Have The Book, (Christmas Present)
And I'm Going To See If It Was Actually As Good As I Hope It Was

In Other, More Awesome News,
I'm Seeing The Mighty Mighty Bosstones On New Years Eve.
Yes, One Of The Greatest Bands Of All Time In What Seems To Be One Of Their Final Shows.
(Hope Not Though)

Sat, 06 Oct 2007 04:28:03 GMT

Ah, I See LJ Has Updated The Entry Mode...

Anyway, I Have (Mostly) Not Forgotten About Live Journal.
I'm Still Here. Hoping Everyone Else Is Too.

Something New... Something New...

Oh! I Gots Me A Shiny New XBox 360...

Oh! And I Beat Bioshock!

Tue, 31 Jul 2007 20:40:28 GMT

R.I.P.
Liono

I'm Alive, I Swear...

Sat, 23 Jun 2007 03:26:45 GMT

Holy Shit.
A New Post.
Anyone Else Alive Out There?

Think Imma Download Ares Now.

Hope You Like Your Toast EXTRA CRISPY!!!!

Wed, 25 Apr 2007 04:10:11 GMT

Some Stuff I Did...

Thu, 19 Apr 2007 05:22:04 GMT

Just A Compilation Of Some Stuff I've Done In Recent History.
I'm Thinking Of Making A DeviantArt Account...

YO HO

Fri, 13 Apr 2007 03:55:05 GMT

I Made A Portrait Studio In Muh Free Time Last Night.
(Midnight To 2am)...
Oh The Lights. O.o
Over 2300 Watts Of Lights So Far,
Still Need Some More.

Here's Some Samples...

Yea... I Added To This One.

YELLING!!!!!!

That's Me Good Bud John.
Hello John.

"GIMME MY EASY MAC!!"

Ahoy And Avast!

Fri, 06 Apr 2007 02:40:57 GMT

Zee Googles

Mon, 02 Apr 2007 05:21:29 GMT

Just A Gallery...

Der?

Thu, 22 Mar 2007 20:34:40 GMT

Just Relized Something Today.
...
There's This Band I Like, They're Called The Alter Boys.
In That Band Is A Frontman Named J-Mann.
I Just Relized He Is The Same J-Mann That Used To Be In Mushroomhead.
>.<
I Really Dislike Mushroomhead,

It's Surprising To See The Switch In Musical Styles.
Good For Him Though, His New Stuff Is Very Good.
I'm Sure Some Die-Hard Mushroomhead Wankers Hate It Though.

The Band Is Kinda A Mut Really,
It's Got Members From Unified Culture, The Spudmonsters,
Dog Fashion Disco, and Ryan Dunn From MTV's Jackass Sometimes Does Backing Vocals.

If You're Curious, Here's A Video...

>.< Arg!

Thu, 22 Mar 2007 04:37:28 GMT

Ehhhh...
I Was Going To Go To Bed, But I Have This Annoying Knot In My Stomach Now,
So Guess I'll Be Up For A While.
Anyway,
I Originally Made This LJ Thing To Vent In, So Here I Am Venting.
I Don't Like Keeping Stuff All Inside And Junk,
And I Find It Relaxing To Write, So This Works Well For Me.

Just Having A Stupid Argument Is All.
I Find That In Most Stupid Arguments
Both Sides Are Usually Not Quite Grasping What The Other Is Saying.
I Hope That To Be True In This Case.
I Hope That When We Talk Face-To-Face We Relize We Were Being Stupid.

I Guess I Get Pissed Off Easily When I Think I'm Being Tooled With.
I Hope That's Not Really What's Going On Here,
But That's The Feeling I Got.

Just Wish I Had Someone To Talk To.

Eh.

Salem

Mon, 19 Mar 2007 05:24:49 GMT

So, I Got Back From Salem Mass. Today.

Been There Since Wed.
My Friend Patrick Lives Up There,
And It's Cool To Keep In Touch With Visits And Junk.

(This Was At A Party, He's The One On The Right)

...A Cool Thing I Did While Up There Was "Paint" A Rather Large Work With Him.
He's A Stencil And Spray-Paint Artist,
Where-As I'm More Of A Pen-And-Ink Guy.
Anyway, Here It Is.

Here's A Detail, It Was Taken With My Phone, So It's Kinda Shitty.

Yea, That's R2D2 And A Zombie.
Oh, And Yes, That's Jesus In a Flying Machine.

I Don't Feel Like Typing All That Much,
Mostly Because I'm Sleepy.

G'Night

Chapter One

Sat, 10 Mar 2007 05:35:22 GMT

I'm Gonna Try To Write A Story.
I'm Nervous Because Usually I Keep This Kinda Stuff To Myself...
It Will Posted Chapter By Chapter As I Write It.
Please Give Me Feedback So I Can Make It Better.
Ok?

Ok!

Well, Here We Go...

CHAPTER 1: Good Morning

The shrill buzz of Josh's alarm clock pierced through the air and shattered what was left of his short slumber. Mustering all of his strength he lifted his arm and fumbled until finally switching it off. He now regretted going to the party the night before. In the shower, somewhere between when the hot water ran out and when the lid fell off the shampoo he realized he was coming up on his one-year anniversary at his job.

"Fuck" was clearly heard over the running water and through the bathroom door. This was not where he wanted to be a year after starting at Rainbow Scoops, the local ice cream shop. Infact, he would rather be anywhere else. "I don't even like ice cream" he murmured to himself, washing the soap out of his hair with the now below room-temp water. He only chose to work there because it looked easy, any idiot could fill a cone. And since his parents were really starting to get on him about slacking off, it seemed perfect. Just something to fill the gap until he found a "real” job. That was last summer now.

As stupid as he thought it was to open an ice cream shop at 8am, there were always people there. So he just considered these people to be stupid too. "Morning Josh, everything’s up and running" said Sonny, his manager. Sonny always got there at 7, even though he wasn't ever scheduled until 7:30. He liked to look the place over every morning and make sure the machines were all polished and shiny. A "lifer" at Rainbow Scoops for sure. A Slightly hung-over "Hey" was all the response he got. Josh went into the back and threw his belongings into his cubby, marked as his by some rainbow block-letter stickers. He then returned up front and assumed the position behind the counter. That nauseatingly bright yellow counter.
He was there until 5. Time has a shitty way of making things you hate linger. Like it purposely makes you savor the bad times. It also tends to hasten the good times by so quickly you almost miss them altogether.

There was no one in line to help, so Josh just propped his head on his hands and stared at the people eating at the tables. Sonny has served them all before Josh even got back up front. That's why he often takes so long to put his stuff in his cubby, he really didn’t like dealing with the early-morning people. He just watched them eat their tie-dyed sugar-based “ice cream” treats.

“Ding-Dong” went the door chime, signaling a customer has entered. Josh cringed slightly every time he heard it. He looked up and saw an old man was walking slowly through the door. He hated old people. He hated them more so when they ordered ice cream from him. The simple task of placing an order for an ice cream cone was un-heard of to the elderly. It usually became a conversation about what his favorite flavor was. And, being as Josh hated ice cream of all flavors, it usually made for a long-winded conversation about hypotheticals. They always ended up getting vanilla anyway.

Gazing his attention back to the old man he noticed he wasn’t a regular. Actually, he looked quite eccentric. The first thing Josh noticed was the top hat. Deep red with black trim. As the man walked closer he saw he was entirely in Victorian attire. The deep red and black color scheme following through the entire outfit. Made into the red material itself was a pattern of what appeared to be clocks and human skulls. It all looked very expensive and well cared for. On his face he wore black tinted glasses, the type with perfectly round lenses.

The old man placed his gloved hands on the counter. Josh cleared his throat, “Can I help you?” He was able to present himself pretty well, all things considered. The old man said nothing. Josh couldn’t tell where the old man was looking. The round glasses he wore completely obstructed any view of his eyes. Josh gazed at his reflection in the old mans glasses. They were like black mirrors. He could see everything very clearly reflecting off them. He saw himself, the menu board behind him, the ugly green tiled walls, and some of that yellow counter he hated so deeply.

As he kept looking though, he noticed something bizarre started to happen. The reflections started to get hazy. They grew gray and foggy. It was at this point that Josh realized the old man’s glasses were starting to frost over. He could see it plainly now. Ice starting at the sides and growing toward the center. Like frost on a car window. His heart felt like it was now in his throat. He couldn’t conjure enough nerve to make any audible sound, though he did try.

The old man’s glasses were now completely covered in frost. The once flat, black lenses replaced by prickly white. The old man now moved for the first time since he approached the counter. He lifted one gloved hand and removed the glasses.

Josh was now staring at two holes. Two holes where eyes used to be, or perhaps never were. What made these holes all the more un-nerving was that they appeared to have no end to them. No rear to the socket. Perhaps it was their depth, or perhaps it was the poor lighting in the store, but the holes in the old man’s face appeared to be two black voids.
Then the cold came. It seemed to emanate out of those black pits and into the core of Josh’s chest. It chilled him to the marrow of his bones. A biting cold that took away all other matters of the mind, even the fact that he was face-to-face with an eyeless old man in a top hat.

It was silent now, cold and silent. The stores lights also seemed to have dimmed, one flickered as if about to die. The old man spoke. Four words.
“You will die here.” They came out as little more than a whisper, but Josh heard them perfectly clear.

The old man replaced his now thawed glasses.

Josh’s knees gave out and he started to fall. He saved himself from complete loss of balance by firmly gripping the counter. He righted himself and looked up, noticing that the violent cold had vanished. The old man was gone. The lights were back to normal, and the people still sat and ate their ice cream.

Sonny, seeing that Josh nearly collapsed came over to ask what was wrong. “What happened?” asked Sonny, in his “I’m not just your boss I’m also your friend” voice. “I don’t know.” Replied Josh, voice trembling as if it had taken all his strength to muster those three words. “Maybe you should go home.” Said Sonny, “You look like you’re going to be sick.”

I'm Buried In An Online Graveyard

Wed, 28 Feb 2007 17:29:58 GMT

Pup Rock!

Tue, 30 Jan 2007 05:10:57 GMT

Just Made This...

You Have Three Tasks...

Sun, 21 Jan 2007 07:01:21 GMT

Holy Shit,
I'm On A Wicked Good Roll With Movies As Of Late.
Newest On My List Of Kick-Ass-ery:

*Ahem*...
I Mean,

Finally, A Whimsical Fairy-Tale... With An "R" Rating.

It's Kinda Hard To Find,
But If You Have A Chance To See It Please Do.
Small Release Movies Like This Should Be Supported.
Like Mirror Mask,
I Believe This One Will Do It's Best On DVD,
Because, Sadly, It May Be Lost On The Average Movie-Going Public.